Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[pip]

@tigermoth. Have just had another look, Marcella (if that's her name) needs specialized help your hubby simply cannot give her. According to her, she's one of 8 personalities. Dealing with her disorder, takes years of understanding, research, knowledge etc. According to the report she has children (I presume they're not with her). Apparently she was involved in a car accident, then assaulted. There's lot of anger, depression repressed guilt mixed up with her disassociation of identity. Is your hubby a qualified Dr who would know how to treat her. The anger that has been suppressed could be violent (don't forget there appears to be male personalities involved). If your hubby is attacked could he defend himself? An ordinary psychiatrist would be uneasy dealing with this as it's a specialized field. Marcella does seem to be blaming other factors for her disorder, not uncommon with MI. Whether the whole thing is pure fantasy or truth, I'm not qualified to comment, but I would be extremely hesitant in involving myself without some positive proof of who she is and what she's claiming. Your hubby has feelings and when we have feelings for someone, we often delude ourselves into believing we're the only ones who 'understand'. Do you personally believe her claims?

[ivana]

@tigermoth,

What responsibility do you think your husband has in this whole situation?You havn't mentioned much about your own feelings about being married to a man who also has a girlfriend and whether you have expressed your hurt to him etc...

Bt, I also watched that 60 Minutes show;)

To be totally frank,it appears it's probably a symptom of delusion if your husband thinks it is his place to save her.I don't know if he had some sort of mental illness such as Bipolar Disorder or simply has a misguided sense of responsibity and want to  play a "hero".

Is his PTSD from being in the Armed Forces or something ( as that would make sense why he want to play hero to her)?

I also agree with Pip that this girl shouldn't be ostracised & needs friends etc but I'm not sure it would be wise for you personally to try to befriend or "help" her.

This would be fine to do if you and your husband were free of any mental illnesses,and he didn't have feelings for her,but with the way thinks are now,it could end up helping nobody but just entangling yourself deeper into this "mess".