Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[AussieRecharger]

@Former-Member 

Good to know that you can talk about it and i get that respecting his wishes is part of the process :).

Does he want to do anything about this?  What steps does he want to take to get better, I am assuming he does want to get better? Is he happy to dial it down rather than quit or put limits on himself? What is it about his life that makes him want to drink?

[Former-Member]

@Former-Member I can hear that things have been really stressful and a significant struggle. I'm sending all of my support your way 💗

Here on the forums we had a discussion a few months ago on addiction and alcohol use which you might be interested to read back on: Topic Tuesday // Breaking The Cycle: Addiction, Alcohol and Drugs // Tues 27th April, 7:00-8:30PM AEST 

You may also benefit from a space of 1:1 support- Turning Point is a drug and alcohol specialised service which also provides support to loved ones supporting people with addiction. 

@Alicat I'll add that while there can certainly be destructive effects of addiction on individuals and others who care for them, alcoholism doesn't necessarily mean that things are destructive. I'm thinking of people who live with addiction who are in recovery or are entirely sober - who still see themselves as alcoholics  There is the possibility of healing 

[Alicat]

@AussieRecharger

 I am one of those miracles who is sober and works a program of recovery. 🙏

I am witness to many people I have come to know, that have learnt strategies for themselves and ways to reclaim their own power back because of someone who's drinking is disruptive or they are struggling to understand the person even when their loved one is sober. You don't have to full blown alcoholic to be sucking the life and happiness from others.

Al-anon is strictly for the carer and not about the other person.

Sharing our lived experience with someone else who is or has gone through similar experiences, we know, is powerful and healing ❤️‍🩹 

[Beverley1]

That all sounds such good advice. My husband is currently in the local hospital ED department waiting to be seen by a psychiatrist. He has had  bipolar for many years, we have been married for 25 years. His latest manic episode saw him develop a very close relationship with a much younger woman - thankfull she is not interested in a relationship with him. The last three days has seen him go into a very deep depression and he is now suicidal. He sees this as his only option as he has hurt me, his new girlfriend is not interested and he cannot financially support himself. Everything seems a mess. I have joined a gym and go swimming every day. I am trying to put myself first for a change. I have lost all trust in him.