Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[vtu993]

Hi
He is 33 years old on in nsw.
Been on the Disability Support Pensiob since 19.
Hes been flagged as can not work.
Over the years... he did try and work through a disability employment group

[vtu993]

Hi
He is 33 years old in nsw.
Been on the Disability Support Pension since 19.
Hes been flagged as can not work.
Over the years... he did try and work through a disability employment group after a lot of work by me.
Lasted 30min then had to leave....
Manged to get him to see a NLP expert and after 3 visits. He found a job on his own. Pizza delivery.!
Lasted about 3 weeks. Not sure if he quit or they let him go or it was a temp role...
That was about 3 years ago.
Been trying to get him back to the NLP guy and doing anything. No progres...
He's very hard to motivate

[pip]

vtu993. It appears from your post, your son either has no interest in working, or, due to past problems, he has lost the incentive. Can I ask what he has that he qualifies for disability? Is it physical or mental. If he has a physical disability, that is no reason to assume he is unable to work. Mental disability could be a different situation, although often people who are mentally challenged, work better because they take less sick leave and seem to be more reliable. I have a job helping the elderly to shop and take them to appointments. The guy who arranges the appointments, shopping etc has Cerebral Palsy and is wheelchair bound. At 33, he still too young to be unemployable. He needs an incentive, is he computer literate, if he is try seeing if there's something in that line he could do. Can I be so bold as to ask if he actually wants to work, the longer he is not working, the less incentive to find anything to do.

[vtu993]

Hi
My son had a psychotic episode when me was 18 and is diagnosed as such.

From my inderstanding it tends to rob the person of there motivation which can be seen.
However this compounded by the fact that when he was younger before he smoke pot.... he was hard to motivate.

He has this mind set that "if i dont want to do it - i dont have to..."

He has never accepted his illness and to this day says he is fine i am not sick.

Hes been in and out of hospitals over time. ..

He can be helped if if allow himself to accept help but always refuses it.

Hence i am runnig out of ideas on trying to help him over come his illness and move on. Onto a better independant life.

[STAY_CALM]

Hi
I empathise with you having a challenging ASD son myself.
My motto is "skill up" and learn all the necessary skills to communicate and support your son.
If you are unable to get him to see a psychologist, you can arrange through your local community health centre to perhaps have an outreach youth worker (if he is under 25) to come to your home and work with your son and you.
If he is receiving a disability support pension again someone work with him and your family at home mat be beneficial.
There are also disability support employment agencies that can support your son's transition to further education and supports around work.
I understand how stressful and challenging it can be to help our children to start helping themselves but it is important to know that there is help out there and he can learn to be independent and learn to help himself.
It just may take more supports and help.

[STAY_CALM]

Sorry vtu993 i did not read your post properly.
It sounds like you have tried everything.

It sounds like he has not had a lot of success with jobs either.
It's a challenging workplace out there and can be extremely difficult to find the right job if your education and skill development has been disrupted due to any illness.
It sounds like you need help building small successes for your son. Think of one thing that he is interested in and explore how you can connect him to that one interest by perhaps finding a voluntary work placement where he also has a support worker to be there with him. Or perhaps a community house program that he is interested in.
Is he exercising?
Explore support groups through MIND that he could connect socially to and activities to get him reconnecting with your community.
Perhaps out patient programs or your local community health centre would be other excellent resources to look at.

[Princessmolly]

How are you going with your situation? It must ve terribly frustrating. Id def tell him he needs to move out and that he will never grow as a person until he does. Help find him a place and set him up but the rest is up to him. Do you rent or own? Would you co sider downsizing to a smaller place to force him out as bad as that sounds.
Do you wash his clothes, cook his meals, buy the food, pay internet? If so stop doing it if you can. He is onto a good thing at the moment. Disconnect the internet. You get my drift.