Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[LillyEtAl]

Just want to clarify that Disasociation and Dissociation are different. They are two different but similar illness. Dissociative Identity Disorder is separate from Dissasociation which is common in BPD Bipolar and PTSD etc - haven't read the whole thread so sorry if someone has already said this

[Jo]

Hi Lilly, this is my fault. I should have written 'dissociation', not 'disassociation' because I was referring to the robotic, dream-like state many carers experience. I'm sorry. 

[Agnes1]

Hi cazzie. My sister suffers anxiety and depression and is suicidal. I don't live with her, but I've felt drained trying to help her, when she doesn't follow through with helping herself, including psychiatric help available to her. I've had to push her to do things, including basic house chores, which she barely does and trying to get help. I know I've done too much for her, enabling her I suppose, but I worry what'll happen if nothing's done. Plus she's suicidal and as much as I love her, and would miss her terribly if anything happened to her, i feel selfish, feeling a lot would be on my shoulders As I'd be left to take on her 17 YO son, my nephew, who would become homeless. He also has mental health issues, but doesn't like being told what to do. He lives pretty much like his mum. I'm the only family member living near them. Most of the family are fed up and can't cope with them and think it's just laziness. I feel some people feel I should get in with my own life, which I do pretty well when I'm away from her. But they don't realise it's a very real problem I can't just turn my back on. That's where I sympathise with you very much. You live it. Outsiders don't. I wish you all the very best. 💜

[Agnes1]

I felt detached and even apathetic at times over my sister and all her problems. When I've been helping her or trying to lift her spirits, sometimes I feel I'm doing it on auto pilot. I can leave her to go home feeling drained and sometimes so resentful. I've learnt to get on with my own life pretty much. I love her so, but get this feeling of indifference lately. Sometimes a bit scary I feel this way.

[sybill07]

yes

i refer to it as brain jumped out of window.

i went on automatic pilot that ended up with me in hospital. i don't remember much of that day, thankfully...

[Agnes1]

Seems like you've been through a bit sybill07.

[sybill07]

i'm not as strong as i thought. years of stress take their toll.

i'm a walking example of how important it is to look after yourself too 😞